From Cate’s birth story:

I certainly wouldn’t have wanted to do this without my husband and baby’s father present, but I needed a woman as my birth partner. I know I am lucky to have a wonderful relationship with my sister, who is certainly cut out for this role, but I would recommend to all women that they think about having a female birth partner.

Your husband or partner is going through his own rite of passage, becoming a father. The whole thing is so enormous for him, he is not necessarily the best person to support the labouring woman. Perhaps, even, he needs someone supporting him. Plus, most men just don’t empathise with a woman like a fellow woman does. I imagine a woman who has given birth herself would make the ideal birth partner, but even one who hasn’t can be an amazing support. She might not understand what you are going through, but she will likely come to an easier understanding of how you feel than a man will.

I know lots of couples don’t want anyone else present at their baby’s birth. However, the right woman will take nothing from the experience you share with the baby’s father, and be there to support you both. Men have only been present at births for a very short time, and I think it’s a wonderful thing that they are, but also that there’s something sad about the loss of the shared women’s experience.

Cate didn’t have a doula, she had her sister as her birth partner, but I think her statements apply equally to a doula! In fact, I’ve heard many people describe the relationship they build with their doula like a sisterhood.